I Lost

Damn, I fucked up pretty bad this time. I lost a friend, no more than a friend a brother. And even if he says he forgives me things will never be the same. I can't believe I did this. I thought I was doing the right thing, but it wasn't worth losing Shadi as my friend. I should have stayed out of it, it wasn't my business and no matter how I felt about the situation the bottom line is I should have stayed loyal to him.

Now I feel very alone. I feel like my friends will abandon me. I mean whats to stop me from doing the same to Brent or Alex or Dave. I don't know what to do, I'm so lost. And then I go to hoop, because it helps me clear everything out and focus on having fun. But Shadi shows up. Now I'm thinking about what he thinks of me and I'm no longer having fun because the situation i wanted to get away from popped up. I wanted to say something, try to talk to him about all this, but there were too many people around.

 So now I'm here wishing I could rewind time. But I guess this is life right, we make decisions and we gotta live with the consequences. I just wish this particular decision didn't cost me a friendship. Shadi if you read this one please forgive me.

-I'm audi 5 Peace